With the NFL Draft season upon us, many “experts” predict where players will be drafted. The funny part here is that while many pretend they know what is going on, nobody can ever correctly predict an NFL Draft. I am here to change that. Below is the most accurate, realistic, and quite humorous mock draft there is on the internet. So without further delay, here is the Eric Pallotto Mock Draft 1.0.
1. Buccaneers: Leonard Williams, or any defensive tackle works here.
2. Titans: Someone you don’t want on your fantasy team.
3. Jaguars: The wrong pick.
4. Raiders: The guy who ran the fastest 40 time.
5. Redskins: Knees for RG3.
6. Jets: A defensive player.
7. Bears: Someone to try and make Jay Cutler laugh.
8. Falcons: A huge prospect who will disappoint.
9. Giants: Whoever the safest pick is.
10. Rams: Someone they got from the Redskins trade.
11. Vikings: Someone who will try and leave in free agency ASAP.
12. Browns: Some poor sucker.
13. Saints: A player who can only play in a dome.
14. Dolphins: An offensive lineman.
15. 49ers: Someone who hates Jim Harbaugh.
16. Texans: Some guy you never heard of.
17. Chargers: One of Phillip Rivers’ kids.
18. Chiefs: A wide receiver who won’t cath a touchdown this year.
19. Browns: Another poor sucker
20. Eagles: Someone who went to Oregon, drove by Oregon, or can locate Oregon on a map.
21. Bengals: A future Pro Bowl unning back.
22. Steelers: Someone who could destroy you in a fight.
23. Lions: Some dude that makes you wonder how he isn’t in jail.
24. Cardinals: Someone that’s better than Ryan Lindley.
25. Panthers: Anything but a lineman to protect Cam Newton.
26. Ravens: A guy who is incredibly ugly.
27. Cowboys: Someone who is more clutch than Tony Romo.
28. Broncos: Someone with no contract because of Peyton’s contract.
29. Colts: Some guy who can tackle LeGarrette Blount.
30. Packers: A guy who can recover an onside kick.
31. Saints: Another player who hates going outside to play football.
32. Patriots: A white slot receiver.