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2016 Food Mock Draft


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It's that time of year again, it's draft season! Now, let's dive into the most important and accurate mock draft you will read this season!

1.Tennessee Titans (3-13)- Sirloin Steak, OL

-The Titans need to beef up their OL. Sirloin steak is a high quality talent that is deserving of the number one overall pick.

2.Cleveland Browns (3-13)- Liver, QB

-Another NFL Draft, another first round whiff by the Browns. Liver has the makings of disaster.

3.San Diego Chargers (4-12)- Truffle, EDGE

-With this homerun pick, the Chargers will be a ten-plus win team next year. Truffle is worth more than gold (really, look it up).

4.Dallas Cowboys (4-12)- Rainbow Bagel, WR

-Dallas steals a New York native here with this flashy yet questionable pick.

5.Jacksonville Jaguars (5-11)- Chili Dog, EDGE

-The Jags help create a dominating pass-rush with this selection. Nothing rushes through offensive lineman faster than a chili dog.

6.Baltimore Ravens (5-11)- Pork Chop, DL

-The Ravens need to get tougher and more physical. Pork Chop checks both boxes and is also fairly durable.

7.San Francisco 49ers (5-11)- Turkey, QB

-The 49ers are in desperate need of a leader. Turkey leads the way for certain, but the fear is that he will only produce once a year.

8.Philadelphia Eagles (7-9)- Philly Cheesesteak, QB

-A match made in Heaven, here is a pick that most Philadelphians will love (except for the crowd who was begging for Crab Fries).

9.Tampa Bay Buccaneers (6-10)- Rum, EDGE

-The first liquid to ever be selected, the Bucs take a calculated risk that seems to fit the team well.

10.New York Giants (6-10)- Porridge, TE

-Porridge shocked the draft world when he ran a 4.43 at the combine. Perceived to be a slow, thick player, Porridge shut up his doubters when he arrived at the combine in Indianapolis. However, as a player, many people still don't know just what the hell Porridge is.

11.Chicago Bears (6-10)- Pizza, CB/S

-Pizza is a great fit for Chicago and will start immediately for the Bears.

12.New Orleans Saints (7-9)- Cajun Shrimp, WR

-Cajun Shrimp is a flashy player that fits the Saints' style well. He burns defenders up quite often, and is an explosive downfield player.

13.Miami Dolphins (6-10)- Baked Eggplant, LB

-The Dolphins continue their questionable offseason with this pick. Baked Eggplant had a poor showing the cominbe, only mustering up two reps. Baked Eggplant leaves a lot to be desired.

14.Oakland Raiders (7-9)- Corn on the Cob, CB

-The Raiders continue to build their roster up with another solid selection. The only corncern is that C.C. will fall apart in crunchtime.

15.Los Angeles Rams (7-9)- Spaghetti, DE

-Average Jeff Fisher keeps his team average with this average selection.

16.Detroit Lions (7-9)- Tire Cake, RB

-Not much is known about Tire Cake other than he is a cake shaped like a tire. T.C. seems to be a solid fit for Detroit, but durability questions are there.

17.Atlanta Falcons (8-8)- Roast Beef, DL

-Atlanta gets a steal with Roast Beef at this pick.

18.Indianapolis Colts (8-8)- Steamed Blue Crab, S

-The Colts pick a player with a tough outer shell they will have to break through in order to untap his potential, but when they do it will be well worth it.

19.Buffalo Bills (8-8)- Buffalo Wing, CB

-Another match made in Heaven this draft, Buffalo Wing stays local as he gets picked by the Bills.

20.New York Jets (10-6)- Creme Brulee, WR

-An overly complicated pick here by the Jets is a headscratcher. They needed a player with more substance.

21.Washington Redskins (9-7)- McDouble, DT

-McDouble has bust written all over him. He won't live up to other meats in this class.

22.Houston Texans (9-7)- Parsley, S

-An intriguing prospect, Parsley performed well at his pro day after skipping the combine. Being selected at 22 comes as a bit of a surprise as many had him falling out of the first round.

23.Minnesota Vikings (11-5)- Sausage, CB/S

-A solid choice as the Vikings get a very versatile defender. While Sausage is on the leaner side, he is lanky and has range. A nice addition to their secondary all-in-all.

24.Cincinnati Bengals (12-4)- Lettuce, OL

-Lettuce is another well-known player with a checkered past. After being linked to e coli, many took Lettuce off of their draft boards. However, the Bengals love talent no matter what the player's character is like.

25.Pittsburgh Steelers (10-6)- Pierogi, WR

-With Bryant potentially being suspended for the year, Pierogi makes sense here. Pierogi ran a lightning fast 4.38 at the combine, displaying true athletic ability.

26.Seattle Seahawks (10-6)- Potato Chips, RB

-Potato Chips will fit right in with Seattle, as he is a loud and tough player. While toughness is not a doubt with P.C., many wonder about his durability, especially as a RB.

27.Green Bay Packers (10-6)- Swiss Cheese, LB

-On the surface this looks like a great fit, but dig a little deeper and you will find that Swiss Cheese is a disappointing player that misses too many tackles.

28.Kansas City Chiefs (11-5)- Shark Steak, LB

-Shark Steak is a tough defender that is almost impossible to get through. The Chiefs get an underrated player here at 28.

29.Arizona Cardinals (13-3)- Stale Chocolate Chip Cookie, OL -Stale Chocolate Chip Cookie is a physical, hard offensive lineman. It is not easy to get through S.C.C.C. However, once a defender gets through S.C.C.C., they can easily keep attacking him, as he lacks the confidence to pull himself back together.

30.Carolina Panthers (15-1)- Breadstick, WR

-The Panthers continue drafting tall receivers here with this pick. Breadstick's main issue is speed, as he only ran a 4.67 at his pro day. However, we should note that Breadstick was recovering from the flu that day and he does look a tad faster on film.

31.Denver Broncos (12-4)- "Special" Brownie, QB

-Special Brownie is only eligible to be drafted by a few teams for unknown reasons the NFL will not announce. What we do know is that he seems to make his team worse, as they often move slower than their oppenents, for some unknown reason.

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